Soggy knees and half assed Tik Tok's
I’ve always wanted to be someone who wrote blogs, as I think we all have something to say in life and things that we can add to the world. Or, in other words, stuff we would like to get off our chest. Right now, I’m writing this as a way to help myself come out of art block/overwhelm and confusion about what is next for me and my business. Most days, when I have started my day really well with a great routine, it seems to go on as I’ve started and continue to feel motivated.
Today, didn’t start how it normally would’ve. I felt bad this morning after not a good sleep and it threw me off. I went for my morning walk (after I’d brushed my teeth of course), thinking it would really make me feel better. Once I was out, it felt like things were getting worse, even though it was really that my mood was at a low this morning when I woke. Someone didn’t pick up their dog's poo in the road, I saw someone littering and overall, it was just little things that pushed me further into my bad mood. One of those deep diving, no stopping tunnel that feels like you’re turning into the grumpiest person alive. I went on with the rest of my day without stepping back first and realising I’m still feeling down and I need time to recharge and process why I felt like this.
I started working on some advertisement on Tik Tok, made a few videos but nothing that made me ecstatic to post, so I moved on. Started taking some photos of my earrings for listings, they were ok, but before I took them, I leant down on the grass without realising it was wet. Ughhhhh, something else? Even though it really wasn’t the end of the world, it really did feel like it. It came to me, after all these things had happened, that I wasn’t trying to make myself better. Yes, work probably had to take a step back until I felt a little better, but the sooner I feel better, the sooner my motivation will come back. So now I’m here, putting my words onto the page to try and make myself feel better for at least writing a blog, that hopefully someone will read! If not, it’s eased my overwhelmed brain a little bit.
As a small business owner, art block, overwhelm and no motivation is something I struggle with quite a lot, and I’m sure some of you would agree too. Also, when you work hard, it doesn’t always show signs of working straight away, unless it blows up overnight in which you’re one of the lucky ones. (Just letting you know you do deserve it!!) I want to tell you how I try to help myself out of negative thinking cycles. I try and reframe them. The other day, I lost my earphones outside somewhere and I couldn’t find them, and at first, I was a little frustrated that I had managed to lose them. After a while I realised there was nothing my bad mood could do to get them back and I was making myself feel worse. I reframed my thought by thinking ‘What is one good thing I can get out of what has happened’ and for me it would be that I can buy some nice new ones (thankfully) and even though I lost them, I enjoyed being outside and had a nice day. I can’t say this will work for everything, but when you know that this thing won’t matter and it really isn’t a ‘big deal’ then it is good to try and reframe that negative thought to create a new one.
I think my reason for writing this blog entry is to just be able to let you know this is the reality of growing a small business yourself, it can be hard and some days you feel like going back to bed and giving it up because you know it’s YOUR CHOICE. But it is also your choice to stop, don’t quit, and try again tomorrow, or the next day. You won’t lose much, if anything, if you give yourself time, you will be back stronger and better. I’m off to watch Doctor Who and drink hot chocolate, bye!!!
Cait (xassydesigns) xx
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